About
I am a mother of three, sharing my journey of hope and survival following the loss of our son...
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Grace is...
I glanced at the line of cars in front of me, all of us waiting for the light to turn green… I noticed a young man standing on the side of the off ramp, trying to look nonchalant in the misting rain as he shifted from one foot to the other, like he wanted to run away, but couldn’t quite get the momentum up to actually leave. After a few minutes, he approached several cars nearest the intersection, presumably to accept whatever those drivers were willin...
More...Feb. 26, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
Slow and Steady Wins...
Yesterday morning I became really irate after an off-hand comment was lobbed in my direction… The gist of it was something like this: “Now, you know we can’t be procrastinating on this deal; we’ve got to get moving on it, have things underway out there before next week.” As if. A wave of heat rushed through me, bringing me to an abrupt halt in mid-stride; I turned around and confronted the offending party… “Exa...
More...Feb. 22, 2013 | Permalink -
Love Is...
Love is…saving some hot water for the next person's shower… Love is…slipping between freshly laundered sheets after an especially long day… Love is…cooking two extra slices of bacon to share with your wife every morning… Love is…a box of Spree candy from your daughter… Love is…Chick-Fil-A sweet tea from your other daughter… ...
More...Feb. 16, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
A Loyal Friend
“What happened? Did you pocket-dial me by mistake?” Grace asked, laughing as she spoke… “Nope, not at all; I called you on purpose!” was his reply… “I wondered if I could come by tonight or tomorrow. It’s been a while…” “Well, yeah! I’ll let Mom & Dad know, they’ll want to see you too!” Which we did. Want to see him. It ha...
More...Feb. 14, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
Sisterly Love
I would have thought that after losing their brother, our girls would be kinder to and closer with each other, especially at their ages now. Well, that and the fact there will be no additional siblings coming along… Perhaps deep down, they really do care, but sometimes I wonder; sometimes their words would lead you to believe otherwise… I love my sisters like crazy and appreciate them far more as an adult than I ever did when we were growi...
More...Feb. 08, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
All Clear
The three long days between receiving the call back and actually hearing the doctor say “you’re okay” were as anxious and stressful as any I’ve ever known. The thoughts bouncing through my mind were all over the place… I desperately tried not to assume the worst, and yet I couldn’t help but wonder what if… I told myself to stay positive, that negative thinking could ‘jinx’ me somehow, resulting i...
More...Feb. 05, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
Or Maybe Not...
I haven’t the lack of fear inherent in my father… Since Brian’s accident, I frequently find myself ill at ease, fighting to keep anxiety from grabbing control of my thoughts and actions… Sometimes my fearfulness is warranted; other times, it is entirely self-inflicted, despite knowing full well it is a waste of precious energy. On Monday I added a new phrase to the list of utterances I hope to never hear again…...
More...Jan. 30, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
Brave Heart...
When I was a child, he was larger than life…he demanded respect and commanded any room upon entry. I was more than a little afraid of him, with good reason. Inciting his temper was an invitation to disaster; we learned at a young age to avoid doing so at all costs, for the penalty was swift and severe… It was a bit disturbing to see this man, one who always instilled fear and never felt it, looking rattled. At no time can I rec...
More...Jan. 28, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
Where everybody knows...
There are countless ways in which your child can break your heart… Even the most innocent statement has the ability to pierce your soul and leave you breathless… The challenge lies in maintaining your composure, in never letting them see how it hurts… In those moments I remind myself that John and I have done our best, given the unwanted change in our circumstances; even so, I think about how the girls’ have been shortchange...
More...Jan. 21, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine -
Speaking Up
There are as many ways into this unwanted life as there are stars scattered across the clear night sky… Whether seemingly by chance or an inescapable circumstance, everything suddenly changed and we were forced into a world where our normal order of things will never be so again… Don’t be fooled… Despite appearances to the contrary, we are not the people we once were… But we’ve become adept at seeming so. We...
More...Jan. 16, 2013 | Permalink | Carolina Sonshine



