MomsCharlotte.com

About

I am a mother of three, sharing my journey of hope and survival following the loss of our son...

  • Birthday Girl

      When I was nearly four, I begged to change my birth date to a different one; I wanted to make it the same as my grandfather’s in March.   I was inconsolable when Momma told me it wasn’t possible…   Later I decided it should be the same as my grandmother’s in January, believing this would fly since her birthday happened to be a mere two days before mine.   Needless to say, I was denied again.   It was one of the first occasions when...

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  • One holiday closer

      A while ago I read somewhere that those who refuse to take time off to rest will eventually be forced to make the time to be sick…       Unfortunately, it’s happened to me enough during this time of year that I have to admit I am one of those people…       Evidently I relaxed just enough on Christmas Eve to let a bug or my allergies take control…   I guess I was so relieved at having completed my h...

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  • A Card Lesson...

        Before December 2008, my holiday routine was fairly set in stone.   While the exact dates of my internal timeline slid back and forth depending upon whether Thanksgiving came early or late, I had most (if not all) of my Christmas preparations completed by the end of the first week of December, save for a few last minute stocking stuffers and baking cookies.       In the ensuing years since, I cannot seem to get it together…   ...

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  • Celebrate Again!

        “Happiness lies not in the mere possession of money; it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort.”-Franklin Delano Roosevelt       There is tremendous satisfaction in knowing a much hoped for dream has become a reality.       An entire community came together to pledge and promote safe driving; while the full impact of this heightened awareness may never be known, another outcome is perf...

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  • Dated, but not obsolete...

        It’s never a happy moment when you realize something unpleasant about yourself, particularly on the eve of the national holiday of thanks…       The road to awareness began when John announced we were hosting Thanksgiving for his entire family this year.   In and of itself, it wasn’t such a big deal.   If we had to have it here, fine.   I understood that the sheer physical logistics of everyone necessitated it....

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  • Forgotten, temporarily

      As the hours rolled by without a word, a tiny kernel hardened in my heart.   “How could he?” I thought…   My glimmer of hope flickered until at long last, it sputtered out.       He couldn’t say he wasn’t told in advance. I reminded him, repeatedly, throughout the month leading up to it...         John is prone to tunnel vision when he tackles new projects; he becomes obsessive an...

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  • Living Fearless?

        There are a few things that strike fear into the heart of every woman, but even more so in mine…   The first is something terrible happening to a member of my family, followed closely by having a serious health issue of my own.       I wage a daily war against worry of all kinds; collectively, they erode my tenuous state of balance. Despite prayer and methodical analysis of the issues, I frequently feel like my anxiety is growing stro...

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  • Runaway

      Puffs of wind pull fiery leaves from their branches; the tang of wood smoke laces the chilly air...   Once again, the heightened sorrow of this season has descended, arriving alongside the early darkness of our shorter days…       It always comes down to the same thing every year, every time.   John believes we should have stayed where we were; he’s confident Brian and Grace could have dealt with the changes wrought by yet another...

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  • 17 Years...

        Oh, Brian.       Some days I can hardly stand the pain… To think of where our lives were going as compared to where they are…five years later, it’s still impossible to reconcile. I suppose that’s my real mistake, comparing now and then.         I thought our plans were golden…   Of course, nothing was set in stone, but I had a general sense of the direction we were heading in&h...

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  • Gone Visiting...

      I did something a few days ago which I haven’t done since I don’t know when…   I spent three hours visiting friends without the slightest concern for the time; I felt no pressure to hurry up and get going so I could complete the next item on my endless to-do list.   I had nowhere else I needed to go, and more importantly, I was exactly where I wanted to be.       What occasion quelled my sense of urgency?   One of thos...

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