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Couple Friends

By Molly Brookins Livingstone

Posted: Wednesday, Sep. 09, 2009

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Photo by Critsey Rowe

Molly Brookins Livingstone is an interior architect and newlywed. She can be reached at tupelo21@gmail.com.

Read more "Newly Wedded Bliss."

When you start dating someone, you want to know all there is to know about that person. You spend many hours talking, sharing stories, and finding out what their favorite food is or what kind of music they like. The longer you date, the more you find out about this person. One of those things is finding out who their friends are. Usually, you can tell a lot about a person based on what their friends are like.

Fortunately, I really do love all of Marshal’s friends. The more I got to know him, the more of his friends I met, and the more friends I met, the more certain I was that Marsh was a great guy. He surrounded himself with great people who truly cared for him and were the type of supportive and loyal people you want in your life. And luckily for me, he felt the same about my friends.

Once we were in full-blown dating mode, we were able to spend time with each other’s friends and get to know them well. Along with spending time with each other’s friends comes spending time with our friends’ significant others. That is when things get interesting.

In a perfect world, everyone would be best friends forever and hanging out would always be a blast, never awkward, and we would count down the seconds until we all got together again. But we don’t live in a perfect world. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not suggesting that there are any friends’ spouses that we don’t like. What I am saying is that we have come to realize that it can be difficult to find another couple to do things with where all four parties involved get along magnificently, and genuinely look forward to spending time together. Not to mention, a lot of our friends live far away, so time together is usually fleeting.

When it comes to meeting new people, it’s not just about becoming friends with one person anymore. Once you get married, you become a team in every sense of the word. You really need to take your spouse into account when you make new friends; it’s important that these are people you can hang out with together. Making “couple friends” is just another form of compromise that comes with doing things as a team instead of as an individual.

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