We knew we were at war in Iraq. We knew American men and women were dying in combat. We knew war was hell.

But did we really know? Did we understand the price? Did we truly feel the pain that rifled through American families the thousands of times that grim military officers rang the doorbell and delivered the crushing news?

The war in Iraq has lasted so long, and is so far away, and has involved so relatively few of us that it was easy - too easy - to distance ourselves from it at times. Intellectually we realized that our country was involved in never-ending violence on the other side of the globe. But it wasn't like World War II, when the fate of the world was at stake and Americans hung on every dispatch from the front lines. It wasn't like Vietnam, when there was a draft and almost everyone in the country knew someone fighting or directly affected by it.

No, this war was different. It was fought by volunteers. Newscasters said America was at war, but what that really meant was that 100,000-plus individuals at a time were putting their lives on the line for the other 300 million of us.

Four thousand, four hundred and eight troops made the ultimate sacrifice in Iraq; 4,408 U.S. families had a giant hole ripped into the fabric of their lives. Look at their faces. Hear their stories. Know them as real people, not just statistics, and the enormity of their sacrifice emerges.

The Carolinas lost 165 men and women in Iraq, each with their own story. The youngest were 19, still children. The oldest was 53, married with three children. Most were in their 20s, just getting into the prime of their lives. All lost their lives serving their country.

They are heroes. They showed the ultimate courage, putting their country before themselves. Regardless of your opinion about the wisdom of this war, they deserve our deepest gratitude.

President Obama declared the end of combat operations in Iraq on Tuesday. As he acknowledged, more pain will surely come. But the moment offers us all an opportunity to stop and reflect and thank those who sacrificed for us.