Won't trade my jolt for a buzz | MomsCharlotte.com
TRACY LEE CURTIS


Tracy Lee Curtis is a humorist, writer and speaker. She writes family humor for the Charlotte Observer. Her column appears each Sunday.
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Won't trade my jolt for a buzz

By ObserverTracy on 10/24/10 12:00

So there's a Starbucks in Seattle that is going to start serving beer and wine. Y'all. This ain't right. This is right up there with putting fish on a taco. This is worlds colliding.

You go to Starbucks for your coffee. Not to party, not to play quarters, not to meet your blind date. But for your coffee - and maybe something fairly cerebral.

Like a quick interview, business meeting, or a skim of the newspaper. I have studied there. Written this column there. And have had a variety of chats with moms on topics ranging from who's going to teach Sunday school, to how to slow-cook a lasagna in a crock pot.

It's a place to wake up your brain. To stimulate your brain. Not kill your brain cells. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about my chardonnay and a cold Bud Lite Lime. But not at Starbucks where I go to think. I mean, what's next, quarter-draft at the public library?

Because I like to compartmentalize my events. If I've made a conscious decision to get a sweet treat that is healthy, and I wander into the local Yoforia for a yogurt, I don't want someone next to me to be able to order a steak. You know? That's for another day. Another place. I don't want to confuse experiences.

Same thing with going to Barnes and Noble. I go there to buy books. Or to browse, flip through cool material, or to read a few book jackets. I don't really want to see a flat screen in there - running the movie versions of my favorite books. It ruins the atmosphere and besides, we all know that the book is better than the movie. Except for "Gone With The Wind." And "The English Patient." And, of course, "The Godfather."

But has anyone even thought about peer pressure? You're a college kid, sitting in Starbucks, cramming for an exam with your double-grande latte. And then here come your fraternity brothers out for a night on the town. You're totally gonna cave, dude.

Same with us moms. What's to stop us from going in for that late-afternoon caffeine jolt, only to get sucked into Girls Nite by a group of hussies who were smart enough to get a babysitter? That's gonna be some Starbucks tab.

And who on earth wants to pay a monster tab at Starbucks??

"Where'd y'all go last nite?"

"Starbucks. It was rockin.'"

WhatEVER. I don't get it. If you want to hang out where you can get coffee, beer, yogurt, steaks, books and flat screens, then get a membership to Costco. You can go in there and get brie cheese or a roof. AND you'll see the world there, so it's totally social.

But alcohol at Starbucks? Total coffee-buzz kill.

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