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With everything from orchestras to DJs, Rihanna to Sinatra, and the first dance to the last, there are more options than ever for your après-ceremony celebration. Whether you have a band or an entertainment host (the new lingo for “DJ”), choosing a playlist that appeals to your 8-year-old flower girl and your 80-year-old grandfather is certainly challenging – but not at all impossible. Vinny Esposito, owner of Split Second Sound and DJ Services, offers his invaluable insight into designing a musical experience at your reception that will strike the perfect note with your guests.

If you think you’ll be compiling just one playlist for your wedding, think again. “We take a unique approach with asking for three lists: a must play, an optional and a do-not-play list,” Esposito says. “We do not offer a standard list, which causes most people to pick the same songs that people hear at every wedding.”

Of course, clarify what songs you would like for your first dance, father-daughter dance, last dance and any other special dances. However, limit your must-play list to about 25 songs. A four-hour reception will include about 60 songs, but remember that your entertainment hosts are trained to play music that fits the flow of the event.

Think about the guests who will be dancing the night away at your reception when choosing tunes. Planning a Southern wedding? Incorporate some beach music or shagging tunes, for example. “When brides and grooms consider their guests and leave room for what they might like, they open up the dance and energy possibilities. Guests now feel like they have a direct connection to the overall success of the party,” Esposito advises. Another way to directly appeal to your guests is including a song request space on your RSVP cards.

Write-in requests aside, some genres appeal to a variety of demographics – and weddings are only increasing in diversity. “Today’s Charlotte weddings are not like those in many cities in the country,” Esposito says. “Many people are from somewhere else. Many couples are interracial or interfaith and have a wide range of family and friends that are different ages and from different backgrounds.” Opt for genres – rather than mandating specific songs – that have wide appeal. Classics like Frank Sinatra and Michael Bublé, beloved movie tunes – think “Saturday Night Fever,” “Grease” and “Dirty Dancing,” although you risk wedding clichés here – and oldies like “Brown-Eyed Girl” and “With This Ring” will resonate with everyone at your reception.

As tempting as it may be, avoid “wedding standards” – those same songs you hear at every single wedding reception (examples: Los Del Rio’s “Macarena,” “YMCA” by the Village People, “Every Breath You Take” by the Police). These songs are wedding standards for a reason, you may say. Is any reception truly complete without a few rounds of the Electric Slide? Maybe for some receptions, but for a unique fete, skip the stand-bys.

Ultimately, the music at your wedding reception should reflect you and your new husband. Today’s entertainment hosts and other musical entertainers service a wide variety of clients and will adapt to your reception needs. “Having a DJ or band that can adapt to each crowd on the fly and handle the wide variety can and will add to the success of the wedding reception,” Esposito says. Reception music should echo what makes the new couple special and should resonate with the guests. Trust your DJ or band to adapt to the dynamic of your reception. With this goal in mind, planning an unforgettable reception will be as easy as do, re, mi.

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