This week, we’re talking about the connection between activewear and an active romantic life for guys.

A reader asked:

“I just spent the past week in New Orleans for the Final Four tournament and was baffled by the number of well-dressed beautiful women walking around with men who look like they just stepped out of the gym. I get it, I was at a basketball tournament, but really the games only make up about nine total hours over the course of the week of events. I actually see this every day, but the volume during this trip was staggering. Why do so many women put up with this when it ultimately detracts from them?”

What you saw may make you mad, but as you acknowledged, it’s definitely not uncommon. I’d argue the explanation has nothing to do with these ladies’ attraction to activewear. Women tolerate clothes, but love the man. I think there’s a good reason a lot of good guys – a lot of perfectly well-dressed good guys – don’t have a girlfriend: confidence. The same guy that pushes through an extra set of chest flies at the gym – and then walks out wearing his workout gear – is the same guy that’s confident enough to ask a girl way out of his league out on a date.

Because it’s as simple as this: Women go on dates with men who ask them.

Not all of them, of course. We have our standards (well, some of us do), but the answer to the unasked question is always no. The guy in the football jersey that goes after a woman has a 100 percent higher chance of getting the girl than the guy in pressed khakis twiddling his thumbs in the corner.

I think physical fitness and romantic success have a lot to do with each other. Not because we women only want a guy who can shred cabbage on his abs (though, wouldn’t that be fun?), but because guys who feel good about their bodies generally feel pretty good about the rest of what they bring to the table, and it shows.

Of course, a man’s confidence can come from plenty of other things – a keen sense of his own intelligence, having boatloads of money stashed in the bank or knowing how to pull together the perfect outfit. A sound body is just one “lucky penny” that a guy can use to boost his confidence.

So the next time you see a guy in an Underarmour tee and his arm wrapped around the waist of a beautiful girl, stop and think: What do I have going for me that would give me the confidence to ask out a girl like that? Because if that dude can, you certainly can. So what is it? A good sense of humor? A job you love (even if it doesn’t make much money)? Impeccable style? Are you captain of your intramural soccer squad? Whatever it is, it’s more than good enough to match that guy.

So go on: Ask a girl out, and change the ratio of bros in sweatpants with beautiful girls.