April/June 2013

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Does the ring attract more attention?

Posted: Monday, Aug. 13, 2012

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Photo by Lora Denton Photography.

Originally from England, Sarah Ryberg has lived in Charlotte for the last 12 years and is a graduate of UNC Charlotte. After two whirlwind weddings - one in Charlotte and another in her homeland - Sarah is settling into married life and learning what it takes to be a Mrs. You can reach Sarah at sarahmryberg@yahoo.com

I’ve always heard that a wedding ring attracts more flirtations. I didn’t want to believe it because I’m a hopeless romantic. I’d like to think that when somebody is married, he or she is considered off the market. Robert and I don’t usually notice if somebody flirts with us, but the bad pickup lines and wandering eyes have definitely been more frequent.

At my last job, my co-worker kept trying to catch my attention with cheesy pickup lines. For instance, one day he asked me how I was doing. I told him I was fine and his response was, “Well, I already knew you were fine.” The pickup lines were often followed by lunch invitations.

Most recently, I had the server hit on me while I was picking up dinner. He wanted to compliment everything, my phone cover, my credit card picture, everything! He had my friend laughing from her seat.

Robert has had girls falling over his feet, too. At the Walgreens by my parents’ house, there are two ladies that flirt with him every visit. When one of the clerks sees me, she gives me an indifferent stare and doesn’t even say hello. However, when she sees that Robert is behind me, she instantly smiles and asks if there is anything we need help with. For the rest of our trip, we’re usually followed by a Walgreen’s shadow.

At the Subway next to his old job, there was one employee that came in and asked for the store’s number. This was after she’d been staring at him on his cigarette break. She brushed it off by saying her manager needed it, but not even five minutes later, she called the store and asked to speak to Robert.

Whether it’s actually the ring, or the new found confidence that comes from being married, I’ll never know for sure. I know that my own happiness has translated into a new confidence and a healthier sense of self . Robert’s more comfortable now that we’re married as well, so maybe it is just our happiness that’s attracting so much attention.

At the same time, maybe it is our unobtainable status that has made us prone to more flirtations. I have read that women are attracted to married men because they represent someone who is willing to commit. As for men, they say it’s all about the thrill of the chase.

In the end, it’s all theory. We may never know for sure whether marriage brings more attention, or whether somehow, flirting just becomes more obvious over the years.

What do you think? Does being married attract more attention?

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