Another friend tragically lost one of her children last month. Years ago we were involved in a weekly tennis lesson together with two other ladies, one of whom also lost a child the year after Brian passed away… I cannot possibly fathom the odds of such a thing…three out of four, living out every parent’s worst nightmare…
Although I’ve seen her since it happened, I have yet to directly acknowledge her loss, as the timing and situation where our paths crossed made it inappropriate for me to do so… For weeks I have been attempting to write her a card without a satisfactory result thus far… Nevertheless, here it goes:
My Dear Friend,
I am so sorry for the loss of your precious child.
My heart aches for you as you begin this awful journey and join the unfortunate ranks of this fellowship, the most despised of all clubs in the world…
While I share this unwanted membership with you, I cannot possibly know the pain born of you experience, only that of my own…
I wish I had something to offer you, some tiny measure of consolation to help soothe your broken heart, but I know all too well there is nothing… Words are simply an arrangement of letters absent meaning when faced with the unthinkable… Small gestures, however well intended, are as lost as teardrops splashed upon the surface of grief’s infinite ocean…
The valley of shadows and sorrow is different for each of us; we all have to find our own way through the darkness… While it is a lonely walk, know that you are not completely alone on this path, for legions have gone before us and scores will sadly follow…
I can only share with you that which I’ve learned through my own struggle…
Hold your memories close… Don’t let anyone tell you how or what to feel at any given moment… It’s okay to laugh…or to cry… Allow your friends to love and help you as best they know how… Keep searching for a glimmer of hope in the distance… Remember surviving one breath at a time is more than enough… Lastly, never, ever forget: of all things, love never really ends…
Standing with you with prayer and surrounding you with love…
A Friend Who Knows
Wishing you many blessings and hope…tg
Tammy will update her blog twice weekly…
