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An Emotional Ride

Posted: Friday, Jun. 07, 2013

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Ashleigh has been living in Charlotte since 2008 with her oversized yellow lab. She is a communications professional, grad student, runner, and lover of all things wedding! After attending 13 weddings in three years, it's now Ashleigh's turn to be at the altar. Join her as she blogs about her adventures in step-by-step wedding planning and tips for other brides-to-be!

Somehow it is already June. We have less than 75 days until our wedding day. And I woke to a call this weekend that my grandfather is in the hospital again. Now, my grandfather, my Paw Paw, has been sick basically the entire time that we have been engaged, but now it is different. Now I am realizing that he might not be there to stand on the other side of me and give me away with my brother. He might not even be there to watch from the front row as we say “I do.” This breaks my heart.

This is an unplanned part of my wedding planning. Missing our food tasting was unplanned. Extra trips to Virginia were unplanned, but necessary. Considering last minute changes to the front row at our wedding is something I didn’t plan on doing, but now have to.

My Paw Paw is the rock of our family. He is genuine and caring and would give the shirt off of his back to a stranger. He is somewhat of a father figure to me and my brother, in addition to being our Paw Paw. He is the person who took my training wheels off my first bike for me. He is the only reason I know the difference in breeds of cows and types of tractors. He is the only person I know of in my family that shares my political views. He shares my love of biscuits and gravy and meringue-topped pies. I got my sweet tooth from him.

I’ve already ordered a boutonniere for him for the wedding. I know he isn’t capable of walking me down the aisle with my brother, but I had hoped he could stand there with me. I’ve always imagined him being at my wedding and the thought of it being any different than that causes a huge lump in my throat.

As I pack to head to Virginia to spend some time with him, I’m filled with happy memories and joy of my 27 years with him. Our Friday night dinners, shared candy bars and rides through town will always make me smile. My fingers are crossed and my heart is full of hope that I’ll be able to see him sitting in one of those white chairs in 73 short days. Just in case he can’t be there, we’ve shown him pictures from my dress fitting and hair trial. And in the meantime, I’m headed to Virginia to soak up some more quality time with him while he works on getting better.

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