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The worst wedding advice ever

From the moment you get engaged, it seems everyone has some wedding know-how to share. A lot of these tips are helpful; some are borderline disastrous. We asked brides for the worst wedding advice they’ve heard. Here’s what not to do when you plan a wedding.

Bad Advice: “The worst wedding advice anyone has told me was to sing our vows to each other.” – Erin, Richmond, Va.

Our Advice: We totally encourage personalizing your wedding vows, but unless you moonlight as opera singers, leave the “American Idol” aspirations for the wedding after-party.

Bad Advice: “I was told that if the groom was unavailable during the toast, the bride has to kiss the best man.” – Anonymous

Our Advice: Making out with the best man at the reception is a great idea – if your wedding happens to fall on Opposite Day.

Bad Advice: “My mother-in-law said that it was perfectly fine to spend $9 a plate on dinner for our guests. She based this on my sister-in-law’s wedding, where they served cold meat sandwiches, au gratin potatoes, and questionable-looking fruit salad.” – Morgan, Madison Wis.

Our Advice: Food is one detail every guest remembers. Whatever your budget, you should allot about 40 percent of it for wedding catering. Work with your caterer to prepare a menu within your budget and try to cut costs in other ways (like by trimming your wedding guest list) rather than skimp on the meal.

Bad Advice: “I was recently a bridesmaid in a friend’s wedding. I’m also engaged and was amazed when she told me I couldn’t wear my engagement ring during her wedding because it was larger than hers … ridiculous!” – Scarlet, Longview, Texas.

Our Advice: Being upstaged by a bridesmaid can be a very real fear for some brides. Handle the situation gently – explain that you’d rather not take off the ring for personal reasons. If she persists, remove it to avoid more drama.

Bad Advice: “My fiance suggested we randomize the seating for all our guests because it would be cool for everyone to meet new people. I can just imagine my crazy friend from grad school and Aunt June at the same table. Yikes!” – Vicki, Durham, N.C.

Our Advice: This idea is only partly off-track. To mix tables with a few people who don’t know each other is a good way to bring everyone together at the reception. But don’t put anyone at a table with no one else they know, and spare Aunt June the stress by seating like-mannered guests together.

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The Charlotte Observer welcomes your comments on news of the day. The more voices engaged in conversation, the better for us all, but do keep it civil. Please refrain from profanity, obscenity, spam, name-calling or attacking others for their views.

Have a news tip? You can send it to a local news editor; email local@charlotteobserver.com to send us your tip - or - consider joining the Public Insight Network and become a source for The Charlotte Observer.

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