Because so many of you fail to keep up with breaking medical news during the holidays, I will now share the latest research on the five-word phrases that instill instant paralysis in Men of the Carolinas.
• Your son’s teacher just called.
• Did you keep the receipt?
• Driver’s license and registration, please.
• Your dog just threw up.
• DAD WHATZ INSURNCE CO #?
• Need to take your mulligan?
• Dude. Your spare’s flat, too.
• They want you in HR.
• I got us ballet tickets.
• Something’s wrong with the toilet.
• I canceled the sports tier.
• Next, we’ll check your prostate.
• All overhead bins are full.
• I bought a warm nightgown.
• We’ve quit doing beer specials.
• Does our kitchen seem outdated?
• “Grey’s Anatomy” marathon this weekend!
• Your week to change diapers.
• We’re doing vegan this Thanksgiving.
• Honey, we need to talk.
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