For a Newfound Friend... | MomsCharlotte.com

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I am a mother of three, sharing my journey of hope and survival following the loss of our son...

For a Newfound Friend...

By Carolina Sonshine on 04/30/14 21:33
Charlotte Observer
  • 'Surviving' bracelets T GARLOCK

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To My Newfound Friend,

 

 

 

Let me start by offering an apology for taking so long to respond…I only just received your gift.  You see, I don’t bother checking the post office box unless I have a package of bracelets to mail.  In four years, I can count on one hand the number of times there has been a legitimate letter waiting; the box is always full of advertisements or random missives addressed to the prior occupant.

 

 

 

I was so surprised to have a package that I opened it on the spot…  As I read the first page of your message, tears filled my eyes and I had to stop; it wouldn’t do to make a spectacle of myself in the middle of the post office, though I must confess, I’ve done so before…

 

 

 

I remember speaking to you after the presentation… Rest assured, I didn’t find our brief conversation odd in the least.  I am used to people wanting to say something, only to be uncertain of what to say.  After reading the rest of your letter, I understand the courage it took for you to say anything at all... 

 

 

 

I am so sorry to learn we have shared sorrow as a common bond…  To lose your brother in a similar way…it must have pained you greatly to hear my family’s terrible tale, so much like your own…  It is never easy to lose someone you love…  When it happens suddenly, those unspoken goodbyes haunt the midnight hours for the rest of your life …

 

 

 

Although we each must make our way through this valley of shadows alone, it is comforting to discover someone who lives on a parallel path…  Like you, I had to visit the awful place where it all began; I had to touch and see and feel, even as the pain threatened to carry me away.  I keep his phone on, a tarnished talisman of sorts, as pathetic as can be; it’s consoling to know he last held it, a tangible link from him to me... 

 

 

 

Knowledge may be empowering, but knowing carries a price of its own…

 

 

 

I understand the overwhelming desire to keep something entirely to yourself; your inability to talk with loved ones while easily discussing your brother with anyone else makes perfect sense to me…

 

 

 

Grief is inexplicable; you cannot possibly explain the illogical logic of a battered and broken heart…

 

 

 

I firmly believe everything happens for a reason…  In my quest to touch a teenager’s heart, I tend to forget about everyone else I encounter.  But we were meant to cross paths at the school that day…  How can I be sure?  Because you couldn’t possibly know that Brian’s middle name is Christopher…or that his favorite holiday was the 4th of July…

 

 

 

I wear my pink and black survival bracelet with honor, as do John and Beth and Grace; the special keychain holds a prominent place in my office, and I absolutely agree: “AMNF-A Mother Never Forgets”.  It IS a blessing and a curse, but I wouldn’t trade one second of the blessing to rid myself of the curse…

 

 

 

Thank you for your kind words of encouragement and consolation…  My prayer is you rest a bit easier and your burden is a little lighter…you made a difference in my life tonight…

 

 

 

Wishing you blessings and hope…tg

 

 

 

Tammy will update her blog weekly…

 

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