John Rosemond

The cover story in last week’s (May 21) Time magazine is all about “why attachment parenting drives some mothers to extremes – and how Dr. Bill Sears became their guru.” That is the article’s subtitle. All I can say, somewhat hopefully, is “at last.”

Q: Our ninth-grade son always manages to get A’s and B’s on his report card, but just before the report card comes out, his grades take a complete dive. Should we punish him for this or just accept this imperfection?

Q: My 4-year-old stepson still has the occasional tantrum in response to being told that he can’t have or do something. His mother, who has primary custody (he’s with us two days a week, generally), is very permissive, so he comes by this “honestly.” When he throws a tantrum, we put him in his “tantrum place,” which is a chair in the dining room. That causes his tantrum to get worse, actually, and it sometimes takes him 30 minutes or more to calm himself down to where he can get out of the chair. Is there anything we can do to help him get control of himself or should we just ignore it and carry on? Four years old is too old for tantrums, correct?

A fellow in West Virginia asks, “My wife and I need to agree concerning our children. She sees things one way, and I see things a completely – and I mean COMPLETELY – different way. How can we get on the same page?”

Q: My 12-year-old daughter thinks she’s old enough to set her own bedtime. We told her that we want her in bed, lights out, by 9:30 on weeknights and 10 on non-school nights. This really isn’t working, however, as she continues to try to stay up later. In one of your books, you describe a system for letting teenagers earn their curfew. Can we use a similar system for bedtime?

If the frequency of my own sightings is any indication, those “My Child Is a Terrific Kid!” bumper stickers are fast becoming ubiquitous. Curious, I did some investigating and discovered that Terrific Kids is a school-based character-building program sponsored by Kiwanis. Terrific is an acronym that stands for Thoughtful, Enthusiastic, Respectful, Responsible, Inclusive, Friendly, Inquisitive and Capable.

Q: We recently found racy pictures on my 13-year-old son’s smart phone. I say we should deal with it. What say you?

Q: While I understand that researchers have found that high self-esteem is not what it was cracked up to be, I want my kids to approach the challenges of life with confidence in their abilities. There’s got to be a reconciliation point here. What is it?

Q: My kids, 4 and 3, are very loud. They yell and run inside the house. They bang toys, get into loud conflicts, and my son likes to scare his little sister by growling like a dinosaur. I know most of this stuff is normal, but I’ve got a new baby on the way, and I’m worried that the baby isn’t going to be able to get enough rest during the day. Should I punish or lighten up?

Q: Our 8-year-old son was caught stealing from the teacher’s prize box at school. He has done this in the past and was punished, but it seems he hasn’t gotten the picture yet. Do you have any suggestions for us?