Kyle Hagel averages three fist fights a month at work, which makes him among the most violent taxpayers in Charlotte.
But he’s a minor league hockey player and they throw punches on the job like the rest of us gossip and drink coffee.
The Charlotte Checkers announced Thursday that they’re bringing Hagel back as their chief enforcer for another season, his third with the team.
And why not? His 18 fights over the 2015-16 season was the second highest tally of unrepentant meanness in the American Hockey League. Who knew Canadians living in Charlotte could be so angry?
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The team also brags that Hagel, a Princeton grad, ranked third on the Checkers’ all time list for penalty minutes (318). That’s over five hours in the box, more time than it takes to play the Super Bowl or switch out the transmission on a Dodge Ram.
Still, Hagel is the team’s reigning “man of the year” for his community work, which includes starting a literacy program and book club at McClintock Middle School, delivering toys to patients at a children’s hospital, using the physics of hockey to teach science lessons in schools.
The team’s press release on Hagel’s new contract didn’t include a comment from the player.
Perhaps they were afraid to ask.