Dear Amy: I dated “Donny” for about two months. One time during the period we were together, we were walking down some steps and the steps were a little wet. I slipped and fell on my side really hard. Donny laughed hysterically and was laughing for at least a minute before he asked me if I was OK – in between chuckles.
The fall really hurt me, and I was in so much pain I couldn't get up for at least five minutes. I had big purple bruises from the fall the next day. I was so angry with Donny for laughing at me!
He knew I was mad. He said he was sorry, but he said that when I fell, it looked like a cartoon of someone falling, and he just thought it was funny.
It has been a month since the fall. I didn't officially break up with him, but I do not return his calls, texts or e-mails.
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I know this sounds petty, but I can't get that cackling laugh out of my mind, and I don't want to see him anymore.
I liked him well enough; we had fun on our dates. Am I overreacting by breaking up with him over this? Some friends say yes, some say no.
Dear Not: The problem with an “unofficial” breakup is that you spend the next period wondering if you did the right thing, when you could be out meeting new people or reconnecting with the original person.
I agree that a person being injured by falling down a staircase is not funny. But I also agree with “Donny” that it looks like it could be funny, in a cartoonish bank-safe-falling-from-the-sky sort of way.
Regardless, if it was obvious that you were hurt, then he should have wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes and done his best to assist you. Laughing in that way and then not immediately trying to make things right makes Donny seem quite insensitive. I wonder if he would develop some sensitivity if he happened to be in your slippery shoes and something similar happened to him and you found it hilarious.
Who's not invited?
Dear Amy: My son is getting married in three months, and the invitations have been sent. I have heard through the relative grapevine that his great-aunt is displeased because she did not receive an invitation, nor did any of her children.
When my son and his future wife requested names of persons I thought should be invited, it did not even occur to me to invite great-aunts and great-uncles. My son has not seen any of these relatives in nearly 20 years.
Is there any way this situation can be remedied?
Mom of the Groom
Dear Mom: Your son's guest list isn't ultimately your responsibility, but his. If he would like to include these relatives, then it's not too late to send invitations.
If he doesn't plan to include these relatives, and if their noses are out of joint, then you should contact them to say that their guest list got out of control and apologize.
I suggest that you contact them because even though your son is responsible for his guest list, you are the one who seems most likely to want to have an ongoing relationship with these relatives – and you admit that it was partially your oversight that led to all this.