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“…See we need a law that makes being stupid illegal.”


Baby girl called me this afternoon; she wasn’t feeling well physically or mentally.  In addition to having a stomach virus, some caustic commentary about the proposed legislation bearing her brother’s name pierced her heart.


She wanted to see if we were aware of it and if so, how we felt about it.


I knew opening the window into our lives even wider would expose us-and Brian-to critical remarks from members of the community, especially online. 


I hoped there would be supportive statements to offset the negativity.


Both have proven to be true.  It’s to be expected when taking a stance on such a highly charged issue, especially when people can exercise their first amendment rights while masking their true identity to the world…


I find no comfort in acknowledging over and over and again that Brian made a terrible mistake…


Did he deserve to die because of it?  Obviously not.


Do I need anyone to point out to me that we failed as parents?  As role models?  Absolutely not.


For the record, Brian wasn’t stupid; we were. By our behavior, we taught him that using a cell phone while driving wasn’t a problem.


His father and I get to live out the rest of our lives under the weight of this burden.


Driving is a privilege.  Cell phones are NOT a necessary component of successful driving.


As I explained to my daughter, this is about more than her brother.


It’s about a grandmother walking home from a neighbor’s house one afternoon…the baby in the back seat of an SUV…two brothers stopped in traffic on a highway…the young man walking along the side of a two-lane road late at night…best friends heading home from school…the toddler growing up without a mother or grandfather…the dad who lived and is still trying to recover many months later…


I don’t normally respond to critics, but this time I feel compelled to say something…


For all of the encouraging and supportive words written, thank you.  To the authors of the other feedback posted, you are certainly entitled to your opinions.


I hope and pray your children do exactly as you expect and follow your rules regarding cell phone usage while driving.  But I have to ask, aren’t you the least bit concerned about everyone else on the road who clearly don’t have any rules about using one?


Maybe a law would have saved Brian, maybe not.  But at least WE would have had additional rules and regular discussions about it with him.  Thankfully, he only hurt himself, which is not the case in the other situations I mentioned above.



Who is standing up and speaking for them?


I am.  No matter what you say or think about me and my family.


Because someone has to.


Wishing you blessings and hope…tg


Tammy will update her blog weekly…