Santa’s still here. Standing 12 feet tall in the front yard of a Charlotte neighborhood. Next to an elementary school. Which you’d think would be confusing to the children he’s waving to. In January.
I can understand forgetting to take a candle out of a window. Or not wanting to take the wreath off the door. But leaving an inflatable Santa in the middle of your yard two weeks after Christmas is a little like wearing your Wonder Woman costume to the grocery store after Halloween.
Don’t they know how it’s supposed to go? Santa comes once a year, delivers toys to all the good girls and boys, and then returns to the North Pole to start making toys for next Christmas.
He doesn’t stay for dinner. He doesn’t spend the weekend. He doesn’t hang out in the neighborhood and he certainly doesn’t stay through New Year’s – his new year starts Dec. 26, and he’s gotta get on with it.
So what’s he still doing here? And what’s he waving at? He could be waving goodbye to the New Year. More than likely, he’s trying to get the owner’s attention, “Yo Yo Yo, STILL HERE! I’m out of cookies and the milk’s spoiled.” Or maybe he’s trying to flag someone down: “A little help here, I’m anchored into the ground and these boots are killing me.”
I feel sorry for the neighbors. If I lived next door, I would be crazed. It’s not like you can recover from Christmas with Santa waving to you outside your kitchen window. And with my kids going over to ask him every day why he didn’t bring them a puppy – convinced that Santa chose to live over there because that mom baked him sugar cookies with sprinkles and all I did was pick up a box of graham crackers.
The only reason to let Santa hang around outside is you either want to feel the holiday spirit all year long and make every day feel like Christmas – or you don’t want to mow your lawn.
Maybe Santa really did get run over by a reindeer. And he’s torn his ACL. He can’t fly the sleigh back, and it’s not like he can fly American Airlines, he doesn’t have ID. Or maybe he just likes the warmer weather. Or needed a break from the Mrs. Or had accrued enough vacation to take off the month of January. For the life of me, I cannot imagine why Santa would be so inflated and elated in North Carolina in January….
Turns out Santa’s a Panthers fan. And has tickets to the game next Sunday. In the owner’s box. He brought Jerry Richardson a bag of footballs to replace all the ones Cam Newton’s given away.
Now I just hope he’s here till the NFC championship on the 24th.