So this mom started a company called Flytogapher, a service that books a photographer to follow you on your vacation for a fun, candid photo shoot. To capture the spirit of the trip in a way you couldn’t do by yourself. You know, just let those special vacation moments just unfold in front of the camera.
Sign me up. Let’s unfold some spring break moments, starting with the night before we leave. Get a photo of all the laundry, as I wash everybody’s favorite gym shorts, T-shirts, and Nike Elite socks. And then maybe a shot of me sliding a plastic bin full of beachwear down the folding attic ladder while yelling, “Somebody catch this!”
By all means, snap a picture of the staging area of boogie boards and swim noodles. The linens and pillows. The coolers and duffles, groceries and laptops, fishing poles and folding chairs. Beach tents and straw hats the size of truck tires. And then a nice wide-shot of what it looks like packed into the car. Preferably a video of how we did it, so we can get it all back in.
I’d love a montage of all the gas-station convenience stores we stopped at and documentation of how much beef jerky was consumed. I’d just be curious. Maybe star the stations with nice bathrooms. And Peach Snapple.
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Use a long-focus lens to show me in the forefront unloading the car under the beach house, while in the distance the kids run into the ocean in their clean gym shorts, T-shirts and Nike Elite socks. Then a cutaway of me holding up bathing suits in one hand. And some sort of gesture with the other.
Ramp up the shutter speed and snap how fast I can drag a cooler upstairs, locate a church key, slice lime and shove it into a Corona. If it’s over 30 seconds, let’s reshoot it. I can do it in 20.
Be sure to capture that special family moment I intersect my children on the beach – when I’m headed to the water’s edge in my cover-up, hat and flip-flops and they run past me across hot sand, sunburned in wet clothes, hollering about needing lunch.
And right here snap that winning close-up of me throwing my head back, with a huge laugh, holding onto my straw truck tire as my Versace sunglasses catch the reflection of the crashing waves before me. (Note: Versace sunglasses must be Photoshopped in.)
And then call these photos Day One.
Because while I appreciate Flytographer’s promised end result of “magazine-worthy photos with everyone included, and in the best possible light,” I’m sort of with Abraham Lincoln, who actually said, “There are no bad pictures; that’s just how your face looks sometimes.”
Because this is how my vacations look …
All the time.