The 5 people you meet at the EpiCentre
You know the EpiCentre, the massive uptown hotspot with restaurants, clubs, bars and a bowling alley. Let’s break down the five archetypal people we see here, person by person. Shall we?
1. Banker Dude: Hey bro, let’s get together after work. We could have a meaningful dialogue about the gentrification of a beloved local neighborhood. Is it progress at the cost of rising living prices for residents and forced displacement of homegrown businesses?
Dude, my head hurts. Let’s get an IPA at Mortimer’s and forget this intellectual discussion about our city ever happened.
2. “Is That a Shirt or a Dress?” Woman: Those bandage dresses that twist your rib cage into a soft pretzel may have saved a woman’s life back in December, but I still don’t have to like them. A dress that doubles as Life Alert is not fashion.
When you’re already spending your Friday night in a concrete jungle gym, you want to at least elevate the look from what could double as a polyester Baby Bjorn.
— EpiCentre Charlotte (@EpiCentreNC) May 12, 2015
3. The Bachelorette Party Recipient: Whoo! This is so much fun. Your friends love you so much they could have picked any place in Charlotte for your bachelorette party, but instead they decided on a spot that could double as a parking garage.
4. The Out of Towner: This person has never been to Charlotte before. They might say things like, “Wow, this is such a clean city!”
Since they aren’t staying for long, they will stay around their hotel in uptown. Watch as this person circles the EpiCentre in search of delight after delight.
They will say they want to check out Howl at the Moon because they are “really into jazz,” but they will end up shotgunning a tasty Libretto’s meatball sub.
Alive After Five is building crowds at the Epicenter in Charlotte. It’s got live music and drinks in Uptown pic.twitter.com/8bl0NkFd40 — Archith Seshadri (@archithFox46) April 2, 2015
5. Alive After Five Junkie: People make this summertime Thursday evening staple into the thing to do. Those who are super into Alive After Five are snooty about it, bizarre seeing as you could see the same thing at ultra-suburban StoneCrest.
The only difference is there are more screaming children at StoneCrest.
Photo by Mark Hames/Charlotte Observer.
This story was originally published May 13, 2015 at 11:34 PM with the headline "The 5 people you meet at the EpiCentre."