The art of meeting people halfway in Charlotte
My latest theory: None of us will make it happily through the rest of our lives — which is to say, adulthood — if we don’t learn the Art of Meeting Halfway. If we don’t figure out how to gracefully compromise with other people, and ourselves.
In this city, the concept of meeting halfway constantly comes up geographically. If you live near uptown and a have a friend who lives closer to Ballantyne, you kind of feel like you’re in a long-distance relationship with that person. Timing matters, planning matters — and communicating all of that matters.
I live in South End/Dilworth and, for about a year, my best friend lived at the Arboretum. That put about 10 miles of road between us and a solid 25 minutes of driving if we weren’t trying to meet up during rush hour. When we weren’t trying to geographically meet halfway, we compromised by alternating whose house we went to for wine and/or dinner.
When we were literally trying to meet halfway, we picked the SouthPark area. It’s the most restaurant-and-coffee-shop-heavy area of town between us, so it was a good default. It’s a good default for anyone trying to bridge the gap between the northern end of Charlotte and the southern end, really, whether you’re meeting with a friend, a date or work contacts.
Looking for a good coffee setting? There’s Dean & Deluca at Phillips Place, the coffee bar at Whole Foods and Dilworth Coffee in the mall itself, if you feel like braving the foot traffic.
Drinks? Some of my favorite sources are Corkbuzz (I love the quiet intimacy of this space), J. Sam’s (an artsy hole in the wall) and Reid’s Fine Foods (yes please to the immaculate patio).
Dining options? BAKU for a dinner date, YAFO Kitchen for lunch and Rooster’s for either/or.
More often than not, though, I’d say meeting halfway has nothing to do with geography. More often than not, meeting halfway means saying, “For sure,” when a friend cancels plans at the last minute and asks for a rain check. It’s understanding you may ask for the very same thing next week when you spazz out over a work deadline.
Meeting halfway means telling a friend that today doesn’t work to hang out, but offering up an alternative. There’s always tomorrow.
It means telling coworkers you can meet at the designated time, but not in person. Google Hangouts to the rescue.
It means weighing the options: A fancy dinner at Heirloom or takeout tacos from Antojitos Don Sammy? And finding: Actually, dinner at Block & Grinder fits the budget just fine.
Meeting halfway means telling your significant other, when asked, that, yes, you have time to spend together tonight, but you need to wrap up your work and get a quick a workout in for the sake of your sanity, first.
It means giving and taking.
Meeting halfway means meeting yourself where you are, too. Recognizing that you have a past that you regret and/or celebrate, and that you have a future that might be unknown and/or filled with burning ambition. And recognizing that it’s OK — and intensely possible — to be happy right where you are.
Photos: Katie Toussaint
This story was originally published July 15, 2016 at 12:00 AM with the headline "The art of meeting people halfway in Charlotte."