Margarita Confessionals: Questions to ask when there’s an age gap in your relationship
Each week in our segment called the Cuervo Corner we take listener questions — got something on your mind? Tweet us @margaritatalk! — and this week we had a few people wondering about age and dating.
What’s the ideal range to stick to when you’re setting your preferences on your favorite app? Because relationships are so subjective and personal it’s hard to lay down absolute rules, but here are a few questions to consider when you’re entering into a relationship with an age gap involved:
Do you have interests in common?
You don’t have to want to do all of the same activities all the time, but you should be on the same wavelength about what fun looks like. If your ideal Saturday is spent brewery hopping, but they’d rather be hanging out at home, can you find a compromise that works for both of you? If not, seek out someone who shares a similar definition of the perfect weekend.
Are you facing the same sorts of issues and milestones in life?
It’s nice to be in a relationship where you can bounce ideas about career moves, friendships and other topics off of your partner, knowing that they can empathize. They might be a little ahead or behind you in life, but you should know that for the most part this person gets where you’re coming from. If they’re still struggling through college coursework and you’re managing a team of 20, your common ground will shrink.
Do you feel comfortable hanging out with the person’s friends?
When you meet your significant other’s friends, do you feel like you fit in? If you’re going to spend a lot of time with this person, their friends will become part of that equation too. No one wants to feel like they’re being dragged to social events where they stand awkwardly and wait until it’s acceptable to leave. You want to be able to build your own friendships with your significant other’s pals.
Do they value your opinion and vice versa?
When you’re dating someone in the right age range for you, you’re equal partners in the relationship. You appreciate your significant other’s input and vice versa. Even if you wouldn’t have been in high school at the same time, you know your maturity levels sync up.
Can you have an intelligent conversation together?
Whether you’re talking politics, careers, family issues or something in between, you should feel like your relationship can withstand more than just a surface-y back and forth about what Kim Kardashian posted on Snapchat today or who did what at the office. If you don’t have much to talk about beyond that, it’s time to re-evaluate the connection.
Photo: Courtney Schramm
This story was originally published July 24, 2016 at 11:00 PM with the headline "Margarita Confessionals: Questions to ask when there’s an age gap in your relationship."