People

Margarita Confessionals: Time to let go of these dating concepts

Welcome back to Margarita Monday! Each week, we’ll be publishing a story about dating by Lauren Levine and/or Ali Washburn to go along with the latest episode of “The Margarita Confessionals,” a podcast for the jaded dater. You can find it on Soundcloud or iTunes.

Just as fashion trends come and go, dating trends are constantly evolving too. Though it would be nice to see some resurface — remember the ease of passing your crush a note and having them check a box to indicate if they liked you? — there are a few concepts that need to be sent to greener pastures.

We delved into some top contenders on this week’s episode of The Margarita Confessionals, including Netflix and Chill. RIP.

But others that should definitely make the list include:

Feeling bad about being the only single friend

Perpetually being the third (or fifth, or seventh) wheel can be tiring, definitely. But don’t let it impact your outlook on life. Everyone meets their match at different times. It’s not a reflection on you.

Staying in a relationship when you’re unhappy just so you don’t have to be single

The only thing scarier than getting trapped in a really bad first date is getting stuck in a long-term relationship that isn’t making you happy just because you don’t want to be back on the market. Be honest with yourself. If your relationship isn’t doing it for you, it’s time to move on. You’ll make it.

Doubting yourself

It’s easy to collect too many opinions when you’re dating, and ultimately that skews your vision about the whole thing. Your mom loves that he has a good job. Your best friend likes his face. But what do YOU think? Hit mute on everyone else’s two cents for a second, and think about how you feel when you’re with this person. That will give you some much-needed clarity.

Not listening when it counts

At the same time, when you’re interested in someone it’s easy to gloss over potentially significant warning signs. If your friends are consistently bringing up red flags that they’re noticing about your new boo, it’s worth listening to their objections. They may have picked up on something major that you don’t want to see.

Spend all of your time swiping and heading out on first dates and you’re going to end up both physically and mentally exhausted. Make time for dating, but don’t totally shift your focus away from other priorities. At the same time, if you’re relying solely on serendipity to meet someone, you could be waiting a long time. Don’t be ashamed to put in effort when it comes to dating. There’s nothing embarrassing about hoping to meet someone, and not wanting to rely strictly on the produce section at Whole Foods to make that happen.

It’s time to put these concepts into the dating retirement home. They’ve had a good run, but let them play golf or knit all day or something. Now it’s all about that positive, proactive approach to dating. If you’ve got additions to our list of things that just shouldn’t be things anymore, we’d love to hear them. Tweet them our way @margaritatalk, or e-mail us at hello@themargaritaconfessionals.com.

Feature photo: Flickr.

  Comments