Margarita Confessionals: Know these dating green flags
It’s Margarita Monday! Each week, we’ll be publishing a story about dating by Lauren Levine and/or Ali Washburn to go along with the latest episode of “The Margarita Confessionals,” a podcast for the jaded dater. You can find it on Soundcloud or iTunes.
On The Margarita Confessionals, we’ve spent a pretty significant chunk of time covering the dating red flags you should be aware of so you can run away ASAP. But nobody likes a Negative Nancy, so on this week’s episode we’re flipping the script and focusing on the green flags (positive signs) to note when you’re seeing someone new. The idea came from this article, which says that the three most important dating green flags are:
(1) Communicates feelings
(2) Admits fault
(3) Is passionate about something
We fully back the importance of these three positive traits. No one wants an emotionally stunted adult-child hybrid. Someone who expresses their thoughts, can stand to be wrong, and loves something wholeheartedly is probably a fully developed person who is relationship-ready. Some of the other green flags we suggest looking for:
Plans ahead
Having no real plan for life is endearing when you’re 17. When you’re an actual adult it’s not so charming. You want someone who thinks about buying a house, their next career move, or that vacation they’d like to take. Hopefully with you.
Has long-term relationships
You want someone who values these connections and can maintain them even as they move through different life stages.
Has the ability to empathize
They may not understand the inner-workings of your office/family dynamics/life stressors, but they empathize with your feelings and want to provide support.
Has a positive outlook
Adulting is tough sometimes, so you want someone who can approach it with humor and optimism. It makes crappy situations better.
Is level-headed
Enthusiasm is admirable, but you also need someone who is reasonable when it comes time to make a decision. Every opportunity that floats their way isn’t automatically THE GREATEST THING EVER OMG. They weigh the pros and cons carefully before they invest time or money.
Has a life strategy
They haven’t met all of their goals yet, but they have an idea about how they’re going to get there. That may mean going back to school, hitting the gym regularly, or dealing with a bad job temporarily so they can advance professionally.
Takes advice
They’re not afraid to admit when they don’t know the answer.
Has a strong restaurant-choosing repertoire
This is perhaps one of the most underrated dating green flags. Debating where to eat is a draining part of being in a relationship. Think of how many hours are wasted in the back and forth of the decision making process until you’re both so hangry you end up at Applebee’s. If you have someone who’s a walking Yelp, you could save yourselves tons of aggravation.
Photo: Courtney Schramm
This story was originally published May 15, 2016 at 11:05 PM with the headline "Margarita Confessionals: Know these dating green flags."