In Charlotte, come for NoDa’s Eastside Mahjong, stay for the community
Melissa Varvaro remembers when her parents used to play euchre with the neighbors several humid evenings a week on their Florida porch.
Euchre, or eucre, is a card game, so, sure the gang let their competitiveness fly with every thwack of the cards on the table. But what Varvaro really remembers is that wedged between the banter and cheers was the quiet of casual conversation.
The catch-up.
And the discussions varied. The weather, the kids, the president, life. Shallow gossip. Deep dialogue. The gathering was branded as game night, but really, it was an invitation to connect.
Looking back as an adult in Charlotte, creating that environment was a great idea, according to Varvaro. “It’s a bit of therapy,” she said. “They talked about real world things.”
However, when Varvaro started tossing around a random mahjong set she bought without knowing how to play and when her down-the-road neighbor Kiki Poland also expressed interest in wanting to play, the pair did not think they’d be creating a third space for them and strangers to slap down tiles, pick up a new hobby and foster friendships along the way.
But they did.
Poland and Varvaro are the teachers and friends behind Eastside Mahjong, a group where folks can learn to play the tile game and use their new knowledge to play against others. And in between the clicks and clacks of the ornate pieces, have the casual conversation.
“We didn’t anticipate making this level of adult friendships and connections, but we’re hoping to provide that space,” Varvaro said. “I know that sounds like a really lofty ideal, but truly we’ve watched that come to fruition.”
Poland continued, “Making adult friends is crazy … But it goes back to community. You yearn for it and in every phase of life, you need people to pick you up. The wildest groups have formed of moms and grandmas, and they buy their tickets together now.
“It’s been so much fun to watch.”
Mahjong, ‘Crazy Rich Asians’ and leisure time
Before we get into Charlotte’s mahjong scene, along with Varvaro and Poland’s spontaneous desire to play, let’s dive into a little history.
Mahjong originated in mid-1800s China. The name has as many spelling variations as it does gameplay across the world.
The premise of the game is to discard and pick up tiles until you get matching or sequenced sets. It’s similar to a rummy card game, though it may require more strategy and memory. And there are more set variations.
The game has had its ups and downs in popularity, particularly in the U.S. after it was brought to the states by Joseph Babcock in 1917. The Chinese game grew popular in the states, despite the anti-immigration laws that heavily affected Asians in the 1920s.
It picked up again in the next decade with Jewish housewives, who standardized the game and created the National Mah Jongg League in 1937.
Mahjong’s recent resurgence stemmed from pop culture with movies such as “Crazy Rich Asians” and the post-pandemic lockdowns, which left many with the need to reconnect with community.
The community aspect has been mahjong’s consistent thread. The game manifests respite. In each popular iteration, from Jewish housewives to folks fighting loneliness, the 20 minutes it may take to reshuffle the tiles is the perfect time to chit-chat.
The origins of Eastside Mahjong in Charlotte
Finding community is hard, especially as an adult and especially in a new city.
Sometimes, you have to build it yourself.
“Community, to me, is purposeful connection,” Poland said. “It’s not always going to be the easiest thing for you to create, but it matters”
It wasn’t easy when Poland arrived in Charlotte, specifically NoDa, in 2016. Nor was it easy when she became a mom during the pandemic.
But it was easy with Varvaro.
The two met because Poland purchased the home of one of Varvaro’s friends.
And they soon connected over being former teachers in other cities and in Charlotte, though not at the same time or in the same school.
“We’re twin flames,” Poland said. “We had that same mindset of whatever we do, we want to do it for the greater good and for community, because that’s what teaching was for both of us.”
So no, the two didn’t meet over a competitive game of mahjong. But the pair later realized they were both interested in learning how to play.
Varvaro was still lugging around her mahjong set to parties. And Poland’s mother expressed interest in the game because, while fun, it stimulates the brain, which can delay dementia and Alzheimer’s.
Poland and Varvaro got a group together to take a few lessons. While they loved the game, their teacher brains began to tingle.
Mahjong isn’t easy to explain and as teachers, (because you never really stop being a teacher, the pair agreed) could they explain the game in a way more people could understand?
“Every time we’d post a picture playing, people would say we’d want to learn,” Varvaro said.
Poland continued, “We had always talked about how we should teach but we didn’t have the space. We just really didn’t know how to do it. There was a little bit of an imposter syndrome type thing.”
They had the chance to test whether they could teach Poland opened her baby and children’s boutique, James + Joy, at E. 36th Street in March.
“We had the space,” Poland said. “So we’ll try it. If nobody comes to the class, it’s okay. We’ll lock the door and drink wine.”
The class sold out.
Eastside community support
Within just a few months, the Eastside Mahjong community had grown.
Poland and Varvaro started with a beginner’s class, then added an intermediate class and open play nights. This way, participants can learn the skills, expand upon them then utilize them. That was the teacher brain tingling.
The open play nights quickly turned into themed events and a chance to give back to local charities and businesses.
The open plays are usually $35 and include a drink and food. The classes are typically $45 and last two hours.
Game nights are usually hosted at The Goodyear House on N. Davidson Street, steps away from Poland’s boutique.
At one of the first events the duo hosted, a portion of the ticket price went to OurBRIDGE for Kids, and participants were encouraged to bring school supplies for Classroom Central. Both are nonprofits that support students.
Eastside Mahjong also joined forces with Trope Bookshop for a mahjong and spicy romance mixer.
When U.S. Border Patrol came to Charlotte in November, the pair held an event at Taqueria Express to raise money for Siembra NC, an immigrant rights organization. They also wanted to support a local Latino business on the Eastside, which had seen a decline in sales while Border Patrol was in town.
They raised $700.
“At one point every time we have an open play, we’ll both be running around,” Poland said, “and we’ll finally meet in the middle and just look around like look at what we created.”
Varvaro added, “The people keep showing up. They’re showing up for their community. That’s them. We’re just moving the pieces into the right place.”
Ugly sweaters at Salud Cerveceria
On a random Tuesday in December, the Salud Cerveceria brewery on N. Davidson Street was filled with laughter, sweaters with blinking lights, a woman in a Christmas tree outfit and the click-clacking of mahjong tiles.
On one side, Eastside Mahjong was hosting its ugly sweater Christmas night. Poland and Varvaro set up about eight tables all equipped with 144 tiles, a mat and a small table lamp.
Glancing around, one would think everybody at the tables was a long-time friend. Drinks were flowing. Shoulders were pushed back. Smiles stretched across faces.
The chatter ebbed and flowed without an ounce of awkward silence. Some people were strangers, some were new friends, others were mahjong besties.
Nessa Steinberg, Kelsie Turk, Meghan Partrick and Yesha Gami all met in class one day. Ever since, they’ve been buying tickets together to continue to play and meet up.
“This is our squad,” Partrick laughed.
Turk added, “I was just telling them about the boy I was talking about last time …. I’m really new to this city and this is one way I’ve made friends.”
Becky Hoech, Jules Mecias, Katherine Murphy and Janet Rogers have been playing mahjong together for about a year, along with about 90 other women spread across Charlotte.
“Our paths may never have crossed without mahjong,” Rogers said.
While other mahjong groups exist in Charlotte, Mecias said she tries to support Eastside Mahjong because of the community building events.
“Especially when ICE was here,” Mecias said. “They really gathered the community and that’s what mahjong has been about. It’s about building community with each other and where we live.”
Murphy agreed.
“Eastside Mahjong really represents Charlotte as a whole. You’ll see younger people, older people, all types of races and ethnicities … And it’s hard to find your group. But we met through a game. We’re walking through phases of life with each other now.”
Poland and Varvaro want to continue providing that space for community. More strangers become friends. More friends discussing life. More community events. But really, more mahjong.
Eastside Mahjong’s final event of the year will be on Dec. 30 at Goodyear House, starting at 6 p.m. On Jan. 6, the duo will host a beginner class at James + Joy.
And there’ll be more events at local spots. Maybe a spicy Galentine’s Day at Trope.
Neither Poland nor Varvaro knew they’d be creating a community through their friendship and love for a board game. Nor did they think that their desire to teach lessons on said board game would open the door to new friendships and small, but mighty, acts of service.
Whatever happens next for Eastside Mahjong, as long as conversation and connection are wedged between the tiles and shouts of “Mahjong,” it’ll be a success.
“We come for reprieve, but we also come for the connection and the feeling of I’m not alone,” Varvaro said. “And not just that I’m not alone in this community, but like, I’m not alone in this life.”
