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Crisco didn’t keep celebrating Eagles fans off light poles. Pornhub has another idea.

A greased pole stands in South Philadelphia before the NFC championship NFL football game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Minnesota Vikings earlier this month. After Philadelphia police announced they won’t try using Crisco to keep Eagles fans from climbing poles again, Pornhub suggested the city try personal lubricant.
A greased pole stands in South Philadelphia before the NFC championship NFL football game between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Minnesota Vikings earlier this month. After Philadelphia police announced they won’t try using Crisco to keep Eagles fans from climbing poles again, Pornhub suggested the city try personal lubricant. Philadelphia Inquirer via AP

Rowdy Philadelphia Eagles fans aren’t daunted by much, and police in the city learned that firsthand earlier this month.

Before the Eagles beat the Minnesota Vikings to advance to the Super Bowl, city workers had caked telephone and light poles around the city with Crisco, CBS Sports reports.

Their aim? To keep the city’s notoriously raucous football fans from scaling the poles and potentially damaging them (and themselves) if fans flooded the street to celebrate in the event of a win.

But it didn’t exactly work out as planned. Committed fans still hoisted themselves up the poles anyway, the New York Daily News reports, celebrating their team’s victory in the NFC title game as those around the intrepid climbers chanted “f--k that grease!”

Observers caught the scene on video:

This week, Philadelphia police announced that, ahead of the Super Bowl, the city won’t be using Crisco to deter rioting fans, the Daily News reports. City officials said they have something secret in mind, but haven’t revealed just what.

“Rest assured, whatever we do, it will be safe to anybody, any animal, any child, anything, but it will be effective,” Police Commissioner Richard Ross said. “I can’t tell you that there won’t still be attempts, but I just would suspect that some of them will be far more difficult than they were with the Crisco attempts.”

But apparently the website Pornhub has some ideas of its own.

On Wednesday, the website tried to tempt the city with a slippery offer as a Crisco alternative: “A few barrels” of Pornhub-branded, water-based personal lubricant.

“When we got word that Crisco wasn’t successfully keeping rowdy Philly fans from climbing street signs and traffic lights, which can be very dangerous, we thought we could help by offering our lube,” Pornhub Vice President Corey Price said in a statement to Philly Voice.

The Philadelphia police department’s response to Pornhub was lukewarm at best.

Police told the Voice that the department has “no official comment aside from our Twitter reply.”

This story was originally published January 31, 2018 at 9:01 PM with the headline "Crisco didn’t keep celebrating Eagles fans off light poles. Pornhub has another idea.."

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