Rabbi: NC bills would intrude on personal choices about about health and abortion

Some years ago, a young childless couple called my assistant in tears. They were so upset, they could barely get the words out.

My assistant conveyed the message, “Rabbi, can you meet with them now? It’s an emergency.”

Within an hour, they were sitting on my couch, holding hands. Their eyes were swollen.

“Rabbi,” the husband began, “we just came from the Ob/Gyn. Our worst nightmare has come true.”

He went on to explain that they had dreamt of starting a family for many years, yet had struggled with infertility. After a few years of injections, consults, doctors poking each of them, they got the news that felt straight from heaven. Finally, they were pregnant.

But they soon found out that it was going to be high-risk. They took all of the precautions, following their doctor’s orders to a tee.

When they went in for their check-up, they learned their dreamt-for child—at this point, only a few inches in size — was likely to miscarry and in the slim chance that it might make it to term, it would die within minutes of birth.

There are no words for their devastation.

Their doctor was very concerned about carrying the fetus any longer than necessary. Not only would the mother’s life be potentially endangered, but there was also the possibility that her future ability to bear children might be at risk.

Through her tears, the mother shared, “Rabbi, the doctor recommended I have an abortion.”

She paused, took a deep breath and continued.

“I have always supported a woman’s right to choose. But, for me personally, it was always theoretical. I’ve googled all of the sites. But, I need you to spell it out to me. What does Judaism say?”

There are volumes of rabbinic commentaries on the Jewish approach to abortion starting in the Book of Exodus, throughout the Talmud and well into contemporary tomes.

I said, “Our great sages teach that a fetus is holy. But the life of the mother is sacrosanct. Pikuach Nefesh — the Hebrew value of saving a life means that the mother’s health always takes precedence. I know this is beyond words painful, but you absolutely have my and the Torah’s blessing. Dare I say, even God’s.”

They broke down, both wrecked and relieved.

In the most spiritually difficult moment in their lives, they turned to their rabbi, scripture, and God to find answers to the most searing question they ever faced.

Today, to my great sadness, there are bills before our North Carolina legislature that aim to trample on this holy ground. These bills will add barriers and stigma to those seeking legal and safe abortions. Instead of allowing individuals to consult those whom they trust with what may be a difficult decision, these bills would limit a doctor’s ability to freely speak with their patients in an attempt to stigmatize reproductive health care.

I, and the overwhelming majority of North Carolina Jewish community members, fully honor the diversity of faith perspectives regarding abortion.

If a resident of North Carolina does not wish to have an abortion because of their faith tradition’s teachings, we respect their right to make that choice.

But for those of whom their faith demands, in certain circumstances, that they choose to have an abortion, we consider these intrusions in our decision-making to be an infringement on our religious freedom.

Many lawmakers will never know the pain of the couple I counseled and consoled, and they must never be given the power to interfere with another person’s faith-based, life-saving decision.

This story was originally published May 23, 2021 at 12:00 AM with the headline "Rabbi: NC bills would intrude on personal choices about about health and abortion."