‘Finally.’ In small towns beyond Charlotte, despite resistance, LGBTQ Pride abounds
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Charlotte Pride 2022
The Charlotte Observer’s coverage leading up to the Charlotte Pride Festival and Parade.
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Emily Allen’s nerve-wracking journey to come out to her family last December ultimately became a revelation about what identifying as queer means in a small town.
“I just started to see in Union County there weren’t really many safe spaces for LGBTQ youth or adults to hang out and be themselves,” Allen, a 22-year-old student at Wingate University, said.
As Charlotte’s Pride festivities peak this weekend, outside the Queen City’s bubble is not as welcoming. North Carolinians identifying as LGBTQ+ face other challenges and are striving to create their own inclusive spaces in smaller cities and towns.
Building inclusive spaces is hard fought in the face of resistance. It comes after Union County officials in June decided to cancel LGBTQ+ events at the Union County Library planned in advance of the county’s first Pride festival, next month.
Earlier in June, Gaston County officials removed a photo of two men kissing that was a part of the county museum’s photography exhibit.
Allen said she noticed differences in how people treated her after she came out. One of her favorite restaurants she used to attend was always warm to her. When she later returned with her girlfriend, things changed.
“I was treated very rudely,” she said. “I don’t even know how to explain it, it was like I was pushed over.”
And while her parents grew to be supportive, other family members were not as receptive when she posted her girlfriend on social media.
One of the spaces that helped Allen was Prism, a club at Wingate dedicated to the education and support of gender identity and sexual orientation.
“I have a lot of friends at Wingate who are also in the community,” Allen said. “I think that’s the great thing about having these clubs and these events is that it brings people together and it gives you a support system that you may not normally have. I definitely needed that during that time... I still need it now.”
The tight-knit club helped Allen find kindred spirits, but when she found out about East Frank Superette and Kitchen she found a community.
The restaurant located in downtown Monroe has become a gathering space for those in the queer community in Union County.
“They have a bunch of events that’s inclusive including poetry slams, karaoke nights, and gaming nights,” Allen said. “You get to meet people from all different backgrounds and interests but they still support you.”
The restaurant also connected Allen to Cristal Robinson, a Weddington resident who was looking to create a safe space for LGBTQ+ people in Union County. Robinson, who identifies as queer, moved to Union County shortly before the pandemic, but found she had to travel to find more inclusive spaces.
“The first year I really just did a lot of stuff in Mecklenburg (County). There wasn’t really anything to find over in Union County,” Robinson, 46, recalled.
Traveling to Mecklenburg County for these resources is not uncommon, according to Bethany Corrigan, executive director with Transcend Charlotte, which pursues equity for transgender and gender expansive communities.
“It would make sense that in a highly, densely populated urban area that there might be more services,” they said, “but it doesn’t make it easier on the folks who are in smaller or rural surrounding counties.”
A 2019 report by the Movement Advancement Project estimated between 2.9 million and 3.8 million lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people live in rural America — at the time around 15% to 20% of that respective population.
Finding community
Since moving to North Carolina, Robinson, who now heads Union County Pride — one of a few Pride organizations outside of Charlotte — has worked alongside others to carve out an inclusive space for members of the queer community in Union County.
Allen, Union County Pride’s vice president, said many of the youth living in counties outside of Mecklenburg need these spaces and support systems in their towns — especially if some are not getting it at home.
“It makes it easier for them to have someone to talk to,” she said. “And that can go a long way.”
Robinson echoed similar sentiments. In 2015, a transgender teen in Union County died by suicide after being bullied by both youth and adults. One of her organizations’ goals is to increase GSA, or gay-straight alliance, clubs in the local high schools.
“I don’t want another child to go through that,” Robinson said.
On Aug. 11, Allen joined Robinson and Cynthia Brown, treasurer of Union County Pride, at East Frank’s in Monroe. The restaurant has been open for three years, but already has come to be known as a hub and safe space for members in the LGBTQ+ community.
The restaurant has a homely and laid-back vibe and is rarely empty, according to Robinson.
“We decided from the get go to provide an inclusive space for everybody because that was lacking in Union County,” Carley Englander, co-owner of East Frank’s, said.
The restaurant holds a variety of events, including drag shows, which regularly sell out, and was really embraced by the community.
Cress Barnes, a co-owner at East Frank’s, said they did a lot of research about the angst and civil unrest that took place in Union County’s history. Currently there is even a Confederate statue still in the middle of town, she said.
“That sends a message, but our message is everyone is welcomed in our store,” Barnes said. “We never intended to be crusaders or anything. We were just who we are.”
Spaces like East Frank’s and Union County Pride were long in need, says Cynthia Brown, a Monroe resident. Brown has been out as a lesbian for decades and was excited to see Union County Pride established.
Brown has watched both the nation and her hometown come a ways over the years when it comes to embracing people in the LGBTQ+ community. She pointed to the landmark Obergefell v. Hodges Supreme court case in 2015 as a true watershed moment for LGBTQ+ people.
Years later in 2021, the Charlotte City Council adopted a new nondiscrimination ordinance which would include protections for gender identity, gender expression, sexual orientation and natural hairstyles.
‘The momentum is growing.’
Members of Union County Pride noted there is a vocal minority seemingly opposed to change. In June, the Union County Library backed out of plans to host a seminar ahead of the county’s first ever pride festival, as first reported by WSOC-TV.
The group also planned a drag queen story time and wanted to partner with the library to host a book club for teens. The move was disappointing, she said.
Liz Cooper, Union County’s director of communications, told the Charlotte Observer on Tuesday the county typically promotes municipal-sponsored events, or events by organizations that receive the government’s funding.
“County administration determined it was prudent to review events ... particularly ones we had not previously participated in,” Cooper said in an email.
Kate Kimbrell, a former librarian at Union County Library, said it was hard to stomach.
“The library is a safe space for everybody,” Kimbrell said. “It’s a space anybody can go for a non-biased interaction for non-biased information. Sexuality, gender expression, the LGBTQ community, well that’s a part of that.”
Kimbrell, who identifies as non-binary, said they noticed a co-worker wearing a non-binary pin like them one day. After approaching them, they instantly hit it off.
Word of mouth has become one of the ways people in the queer community are finding and sharing their own spaces and resources in Union County, Kimbrell said.
Kimbrell recently resigned from the library, in part because the library canceled the Pride events. But they worried about those who had found a comforting person to walk up to and ask about more LGBTQ+ resources.
“With me being gone, it’s so important they still feel safe when they walk up to someone at the library,” Kimbrell said. “The need is there and the momentum is growing.
Elsewhere, Robinson points to Salisbury Pride and Rock Hill Pride, both established within the last decade, as examples of smaller counties or cities that have seen local organizations work to make their own towns more inclusive.
This story was originally published August 17, 2022 at 6:00 AM.
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