‘Bachelorette’ Week 5 recap: This week’s update on UNC’s Xavier Bonner
READ MORE
Read more about Xavier Bonner on ‘The Bachelorette’
The UNC-Chapel Hill doctoral candidate is courting Charity Lawson on Season 20 of “The Bachelorette.” Here’s our coverage.
Expand All
Our local “Bachelorette” contestant Xavier Bonner had a really great a one-on-one date with Charity Lawson last week, so we’re hoping this week’s episode isn’t a letdown.
Xavier, dubbed by social media fans as the “unbothered knitting biomedical king,” is a UNC Chapel Hill Ph.D. candidate who is secure enough in his 6’6” masculinity to show off his needle skills in a roomful of competing male egos. And we love him for it. (In Week 3, Xavier knitted Charity a chunky scarf and last week he knitted a pink pocket square for his rose ceremony suit.)
But of course, last week’s big news was his date with Charity. She was nervous because something about Xavier reminded her of her ex (and not in a good way) but it seems like Xavier reassured her that he is the kind of person who will do anything for his partner.
This week, the gang headed to New Orleans, and we got not two but three one-on-one dates. Four men advanced, with hometown dates being on next week’s schedule. Here’s what happened.
Week 5: The first 3 dates
▪ One-on-one date #1: The first one-on-one date went to Joey and it started with a carriage ride to Muriel’s for a creole lunch. They had a Tarot card reading, got some beads and danced to a jazz band on the street. They also answered questions about each other for a dude with a cute little typewriter who composed poetry on the spot.
That night, that sat in front of some beautiful food, which they never touched, and talked about how great the day was. Charity had to ask Joey, who is white, how he thinks he’d handle being in an interracial relationship. Joey said he would listen and learn, and that he sees her for who she is and that he will be the person she needs him to be. Charity got emotional (“really happy, happy tears,” she said) and Joey told her that he’s falling in love with her. He got a rose.
▪ Two-on-one date: The dreaded two-on-one date, the always awkward outing during which one person always* goes home, went to Sean and Tanner. No one ever wants this date. The threesome went out on a swamp and looked at gators. They ate crawfish and the boat captain said if she didn’t pick either one of them, he’s “right over here.” Charity obviously vibed more with Sean than Tanner (she kissed Sean, not Tanner), but there’s still a night portion to come.
At the dinner (my mom pointed out that neither man pulled her chair out for her), the basic vibe is Sean is super confident, Tanner is super hopeful. Annnnnd ... the wise Charity decides to give no one a rose. Sean is stunned and Tanner seems happy to not have lost to Sean. Neither go home.
*Rules are made to be broken, it seems.
▪ One-on-one date #2: The second one-on-one date went to Dotun. They met super early and ran the Crescent City Classic 10k race/fun run. This is my kind of 10k: 1/ it appeared to be mostly walking and 2/ they got to eat and drink all the way through. Dotun said it was a very normal and “real world” kind of date.
At the night portion of the date, another uneaten dinner (Dotun did pull out her chair) and more talk about the experience being scary. Dotun said his heart is totally in this, and Charity said that Dotun makes her very happy. Dotun said his heart is telling him that he’s falling in love with her, and Charity is “overjoyed.” He gets the rose.
Early exit for Sean
Xavier and Aaron, the only guys who haven’t had dates so far tonight, found out they’re getting clumped into a group date with Sean and Tanner. No one is thrilled about this, but Sean started to spiral.
He went to visit Charity, and at this point, something tells me that the next day’s four-person group date is going to have just three people on it.
Sean pleads his case to Charity and tells her he’s falling in love with her, but she can’t reciprocate. She has connections with others that are stronger. He doesn’t want her to give up, still lobbying for a one-on-one date. She tells him again that she’s just not there. “What you want from me, I can’t give, and I’m very fearful of not being able to get there. I don’t think that I can,” she tells him. He leaves, and cries.
The last group date
Xavier, Aaron and Tanner head out on their date, with two roses on the table. There are no silly games or activities, just three adult men hanging out with the one woman they are all dating — just normal stuff.
Xavier is wearing a big fluffy sweater and all I can think is, “Did he knit that?”
We get some insight into how Xavier is feeling: He tells the camera that he really likes Charity and “wants to fall in love.” He tells Charity that the idea of forever scares him, because he wants to do it once and wants to do it right. He wants to get engaged and get married, but there’s the question of whether that’s her. He doesn’t know what’s going to make him fall in love, he tells her, but he thinks he can get there. He doesn’t want to pass up that chance, he tells her.
She is visibly not thrilled.
Does Xavier get a rose?
Rose #1: Aaron gets a rose and he’s so excited to take her to Texas.
Rose #2: Charity says she can’t give out a rose right then, she needs more time to think. Gah!
Before the rose ceremony, Charity goes to visit Tanner and tells him that she doesn’t want to be the person who lets him down, but she can’t give him the rose. “You are truly an incredible person,” she tells him through tears. Tanner tells the camera later that he tried to be as strong as possible because he didn’t want her to hurt more, knowing how much she hurt him. TANNER! (See you in “Paradise,” I hope.)
So in the end, Xavier gets the remaining rose. She seems reluctant, but tells him she wants to meet his family and get to know him more.
“This rose means everything to me,” he said. “I’m ready to keep this train going so I can fall in love.”
He’ll be back next week for a hometown date. Even though Xavier’s in school in Chapel Hill, he’s from Ohio and that’s where he’ll take Charity to meet the fam.
Who went home on Week 5 of ‘The Bachelorette’?
There was no rose ceremony this week, all of the roses were handed out on dates. But these guys didn’t get a rose this week:
- Sean
- Tanner
How to watch ‘The Bachelorette’
“The Bachelorette” airs at 8 p.m. each Monday on ABC. You can also stream on Hulu.
This story was originally published July 24, 2023 at 10:07 PM with the headline "‘Bachelorette’ Week 5 recap: This week’s update on UNC’s Xavier Bonner."
